So, I mentioned in my last post that I have taken to filtering what information and entertainment I allow into my mind...for my own peace. It is still a work in progress for me, but I find that the more mindful I am about what I see - the more I stop mindlessly watching and begin to analyze - the less I actually even care to watch, swipe, and surf.
Now I want to ask YOU...have YOU ever given any serious thought to the stuff you see and watch on television, or on screen? The stuff you let into your own head?
Think about it...
The movies, the podcasts, series episodes, Youtube channels, reality tv shows...the list goes on.
These days, people (most, anyways, I would say) watch these things...often mindlessly and in marathon sessions. They watch them as they're eating meals, in bed in the mornings before they rise, and in bed - often on phones - at night before they fall asleep.
If you do, have you ever asked yourself why?
Have you ever thought about the things you watch? The content, the message, the lessons they offer?
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself how the things you watch make you feel?
I ask because I've had to reduce and regulate what gets into my head...quite out of necessity.
Years ago, after my strokes, I spent a lot of time watching TV. I lived on a couch and in bed for far too long, feeling like a wreck, unable to do much physically. I was so bored...and really angry. With my memory affected, my lifelong dependency on and absolute love of books and reading came to a crashing end...I simply got too frustrated trying to remember character names and details that I, having had so many of my brain's cells and pathways obliterated, could no longer remember.
Then came the radiation. Not fun. It was after the radiation that I began to seriously complain about feeling overloaded and overwhelmed. While I had been dealing with slower processing speeds and an inability to deal under pressure for years, the radiation is what started me going on about my "big bang" brain analogy, where I felt like my thoughts were flying away from me at warp speed.
(Just as an aside, and as many people with brain trauma can attest to, neuro symptoms are often incredibly hard to describe).
It was a gradual process, I think, the increasing regulation and control over what I've allowed - and continue to allow - into my head.
I've not been to a theatre movie in a decade...too noisy, too peopley.
The last movie I watched at home...A Dog's Purpose. No surprise there.
I never watch a show in real time these days, because of the commercials...which just make me feel as though somebody else must think I'm stupid and gullible.
I don't watch shows that feature weird demonic human creatures creeping along the walls...because they just make me feel gross, weird me out and increase my blood pressure (contraindicated in my situation...lol).
I don't watch CSI, or Silence of The Lamb type stuff, because it simply makes me feel horrible about humanity...and as though it just gives those for real psychopathic and sick and scary people, who unfortunately do truly live amongst us, gross ideas and something to strive towards.
And I don't watch anything to do with feet (there is a new TLC show about a foot doctor...gag) because I have a weird aversion to the things. Seriously, as a a nurse, I could watch open heart surgery, neurosurgery, and deal with traumatic amputations...but an ingrown toenail would make me feel like I wanted to hurl.
Anyways, there I go off on a tangent. It's a thing with me...
I guess my point here is that, as I've gone about gradually reducing and regulating what I will give my brain access to, the thing I've learned to rely on most heavily in my decision making - my most discriminating filter - is how whatever it is I'm watching makes me feel.
There are enough things in this world that can drag me down; that make me feel bad, patronized, angry, stupid, scared, and/or hopeless...I just don't see a point in allowing my viewing choices to compound any or all of those negative emotions.
My hope is that, as long as I continue to remain positive in all things - and allow only positive things to impact my mind and body (as much as is possible anyway), my life will increasingly trend in a positive direction.